May 27, 2003
Crappy Erotica

Finally got around to reading some of nerve's bad erotica contest just now. The winner, "Bill", with his piece, "untitled", is truly our rightful champ. But I also think the first runner-up had something pretty serious going on.

Sure, as erotica, it's awful. But as entertainment, it's absolutely first-rate. It will make you wonder, "Who are all these people?", and, "Where do they live?" and "What do they do with their time?" and also, "Are they trying to turn me on, or just win top prize in Nerve's Bad-Erotica Writing contest?"

I give this competition twelve out of a possible twelve stars!

Next year, I'm submitting!

(via the ubiquitous adampsyche)

Posted by at May 27, 2003 01:42 PM

you didn't find the 1st runner up erotic? What about: "Randy's greedy asshole wanted more"? What about that line huh? What's not to get horny about a greedy asshole? God that's sexy. Interestingly enough -- interestingly enough for me that is -- I once had a chance to take it up the ass from a girl with a strap-on. A chance I passed on. I don't regret not having a greedy asshole, my asshole just isn't all that greedy. My cock is relatively greedy I suppose but not my asshole. "My greedy cock wanted her arrogant snatch." Na, that sounds like garbage. I can't write erotica to save my life. Maybe it's just the cadence of that line that rings hot: Randy's greedy asshole wanted more. I can't get over it!

Posted by: king on June 2, 2003 10:06 AM .

"My greedy cock wanted her arrogant snatch." You may not be able to write erotica, but I'm thinking you can take home a prize next year, should you care to.

Posted by: on June 3, 2003 06:34 PM .

Prancing cock, mournful snatch?

Posted by: D on June 4, 2003 10:56 AM .
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